Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Abhijit Bathe ko gussa kyon aataa hai?

Now its becoming a bit too much - the urge to write or an excuse to run away from other responsibilities?
Bryson used to say that PhD students have the cleanest apartments - they do anything and everything to procrastinate from their work!!
Well my apartment is not that fortunate!
I have to pull myself away from the bed in the morning, go to the office, work, think of loosing some weight during lunch, fight the sleep with cups of coffee, and (then) try to do some work....

Ya, ya - I hear the murmurs....but even I am entitled to complain about my job sometime.

Today was a test - I watched an Orioles game right from the first pitch and couldnt believe my eyes when they were leading for a couple of innings. But I am seriosly thinking of becoming a punter, so predictable is my relation with them! Its the bottom of the 8th and they are 1 down trailing 6-4.

Guess what - O's lost....

I have promised you guys a different ride, but really, how different it really is?

I was walking home with a friend once and all of a sudden she asked me - why are you so angry?

Am I?
Yes I am.
I dont know why.
Maybe its just a habit.
I get angry and then I devise a solution to it - aim and then go about it.
I do get angry going about it too, but there is always something to be chased. Once I get it, I get confused and then obviously - angry.
Till I find my next target.

Baba wants to talk to my friends and would like all of us to talk to all our friends - he thinks we will find some missing jigsaw pieces in the process. Will we really?
My guess is, we will get more confused about the person we thought we knew!
We behave in so many different roles in so many different places.
Put that together and do we get the complete picture? The missing jigsaw pieces??

BTW, why do we have to complete that jigsaw puzzle?
Why cant we leave it like that and just enjoy the corner that we got for ourselves?
Why do I use so many question marks??

Why really - I am so angry?

Monday, June 05, 2006

Searching for words


The mind thinks of beautiful pieces when its not thinking of writing.
What happens to it when the fingers touch the keypad??

Just now I thought of writing about the phone conversation I had with an old friend, or of how Orioles always loose whenever I watch their game, of Da Vinci Code, or of general summer mood....

But what happened to the great ideas - like that letter to Sheikh Nissar Ahmed, or about Renigunta Junction, the dikes around Tirupati, and to the Madras Monsoon?

It needs patience to reach that moment's exuberance through writing.
Dreams are dreamt in fractions of seconds but they can define your mood for the next day. So many unsaid, unheard, felt, sensed things need to be "explained" or rather described in order to recreate that effect that you felt in that one moment.

bas itni see to jaan hotee hai ek gaane kee...
haan kuchh lamhe baraso jindaa rahte hain....

The most difficult thing about writing is to be honest with yourself, not to pretend, not get worried about how people will judge you by your writing - take my word, its downright difficult. I am trying that "Finding Forrester" line - Damn it! Write. Dont think.

Gagan sadan, sadip khare, kawita, paaus, pune, books, nadee, bhor, Dhag, high school, shaalaa, wahi pustak, jagan, punhaa paaus, punhaa punhaa paaus......

aataa purey!

Sunday, June 04, 2006

What not to do on Sunday!

What did I do today?
Got up late, started reading news, followed the cricket scores, watched TV for sometime, felt like downloading some Bob Dylan songs and ended up dowloading a lot of Indian classical music.
Ya I would like to develop my interest in it, and it does feel good listening to.....sometimes.
But I dont know anything about it.
If someone asks me which raga is this or who sung it?
Or plain - what do u like about it??

I have been planning to clean the apartment for last 4 days but havent had time (!) to do it.
Wait a minute - I am lying.
I have plenty of time - its just that I am too lazy to move.
I look for "inspiration" to get out of my bed!!
Its already 2.00pm and whats my plan for today?

Get up, cook, have some whisky before the lunch and some white wine after......or should I move them around? (BTW, got some good Souvignon Blanc - I am going to learn some good wine tasting also.....taking a few lessons from Thomas. God how many things am I trying to learn at the same time!!)
Complete the Arthur Hailey book "Hotel" which I have been reading bit by bit since last 4 days - I dont think I will be able to complete it though.
I like Arthur Hailey - bithaake rakhataa hai!!
I had read his "Final Diagnosis" sometime back.

Read MT Aiwa Maru by Anant Samant and Five Point Someone by Chetan hagat. My wife didnt let me complete Da Vinci Code as she had to read it.

What else? Need to clean the apartment - its not bad, just needs to be vacuum cleaned, and ya, need to return some calls - u see u have to maintain relations when you get married!!
As someone said - you have to "work" on your marriage!
I am already panting at the first round called marriage and already looking for inspiration to return my "in-laws" calls, but I am sure I will get used to it and wont have to make an effort doing that.

Its how you look at it - I can say that I relaxed on a Sunday and did nothing, exactly as I wanted.....
Sounds positive right?